Latterly, Mad'n'Bad has been walking with the Bigger Boys and in a very Big-Boy-Full-of-Testosterone fashion has broken one or two of them on the way. You may find this difficult to believe, but the old bastard had one or two good points. But let's not get carried away, there were only one or two. The first was a magical propensity to produce cans of beer from his tiny man-bag when all was seemingly lost. The second was to pour oil over the stormy waters that is the relationship between Lord Elpus and me.
Phil and I walked as a pair for the 2016 Challenge. The silence was blissful. I was not jabbed once by flailing walking pole-tips and rest stops were taken plentifully and at length; No-one stomped about in the far distance harrumphing. We walked along roads in polite lines; No vehicles were seen to fly off into the scenery or bury themselves in roadside ditches.
But there were no magical beers and the disputes were wild and stormy. For 2017, Something Had To Be Done. We needed another Fixer. Another Bon Viveur. Another intellect to calm the stormy outbursts. A Third Way.
We believe we have found just the chap:
God, No! Not the lunatic on the left. He's Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to know. No Sir. The fellow who has chosen to join this elite team is the smiley gentleman on the right: David 'VeryVeryNiceMan' Williams.
When we let the Fat Controller at Challenge Control know that David was walking with us, there was a stunned silence. At length, this was followed by "Does he know what he has let himself in for?"
And this is what he has let himself in for. This is the route Phil (who is our Team Captain again this year) will shortly be sending off to the Vetters.
|LAMBERT/SLOMAN/WILLIAMS TGO CHALLENGE 2017 MAP: CLICK TO ENLARGE|
The route is a heady mix of high-level camps, crafty Corbetts, mad Munros, rocky ridges and handsome hotels. And there's a cheese and wine party thrown in as well, at two thousand, six hundred and sixty six Imperial Feet above Her Majesty's Ordnance Datum.
|CLICK TO ENLARGE|
|CLICK TO ENLARGE|
What could possibly go wrong?