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Thursday, 1 February 2007

A MOMENT OF CALM

I shall not speak to those terrible people at USPS today. It is not good for my health. Instead I am thinking calm thoughts. Thoughts about… Good People.

People like my wonderful Learned Friend, The Doc.

Did I tell you he lives in the village? Our village is full of wonderful people and the Doc fits slap bang into that category. Our village is also full of philanderers, rogues (loveable and otherwise), accountants, and Bank managers too, but we don’t talk about them.

My village Doc takes up the ‘Cerberus Defence’ when I visit him recently. The Practice Doctors instruct the guardians at the gates of Hell at reception, in a set of rules to protect the Doctors. But as the Doc pointed out to me, these rules are there to be leaned against, put out of shape and bent a little, from time to time. And this is that time. He trawls through my medical records on screen and gives me the current low-down on the state of the war with my kidneys. He demonstrates that he is in control of the situation, but my kidneys are not. No change there then.

Before I depart to the southwest I can collect four months of Gout & Blood Pressure pills to make me a calmer person. I am not allowed to consume them all at once, because that way I could end up very calm indeed.

When I next speak to the people at USPS I shall force a few pills down the mouth piece of the telephone to calm them down too. About a dozen should do it.

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